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Well a couple of interesting things happened last night. i was talking to mat on the computer when his real mom called him. She started talking to him about the wedding and how happy she is for the both of us and how she supports us 100%. They got of the phone and i guess his mom thought that his grandma knew about the wedding so she called her hoping to make some plans with her. Well...granny doesnt like me very much, and definately didnt know about us getting married. So, a few minutes later, Mat gets a phone call from granny bitching him out for him even thinking about marying someone who worships dracula (What??) Yes, i guess she believe what mats uncle told her as true when he was only joking around with her. That I worship dracula and the devil because i am here on vampirerave.

Well mat then called his mom back and asked her exactly what she said and then his mom said that she would lay the guilt trip on granny so that she wouldnt call my mom and open up a new can of worms.

Well, She told granny that we arent going to get married for three years and she had just misunderstood what mat told her. Granny then replied that good, she would pray every single night that i do something like cheat on him so that mat doesnt marry a devil worshiper.

Well after his mom called him back and told him that she had straightened it out somewhat with granny..mat called granny back. we had been talking about church a little and i said i would go, that i have nothing against church, i just dont go every sunday. I told him if it would help to tell her i would gladly go with her to church sometime.

Well he told her and she told him that she is happy that i want to go to church and blah blah blah and that she wouldnt call my house. His mom also told him to tell me she wants to pick me up so we can go somewhere so that she can get to know me.

i was a little in shell shock i think lol. i think that i still am. There was so much happening at once. I will add more to this later i think. I got the interesting stuff done with lol

Well I have been neglecting this thing for a while now. Hehe so much for me saying that i was going to write here every single day. Nothing much new has happened to write about. I am not having the best o days, just for irritability reasons. Everything has been bothering me for some reason.



My online class began yesterday but I hadnt started any assignments other then the introuctory part.



Today i did the very first assignment. We had to answer two questions on ethics and post it into a forum type deal. So i did that and after 15 minutes i checked back and had to laugh that i ahd to be the one to break the ice, there were two more posts already. So i opened the first one to read what this girl thought and I got PISSED. She wrote and set up her paper the exact way i did. The only thing she did differently was move the words around, but i could tell. Everythig in her paper is exactly hat i wrote. I dont understand it, now that i think about it that is pretty damn ironic. Shes cheating...on an ethics question. Lol.



I talked to Mat this morning and that was very nice. I told him on monday morning i would be getting on the computer when he got home. Well mom got her wIIS last night and wanted to try to do them at home on the computer with her H&R block program so i missed him

(Just barely) when he got on :( I stayed on until 8:30 and then decided to go take a shower and go to bed. and then go figure he got back on again right after i left. But anyways i got to hear his voice this morning.

Depending on the size o his check with them taking out 1000 of it we shoul be able to hav the plane ticket tomorrow!!! I sure hope so!! I am so excited about seeing him!!!!!! I need to sooo badly.



Hehe oh yes. I told mat that i wanted to do something that would make him feel very special while i was there. I was talking to him and tossing around ideas in my head when a couple came to me and i fgured out what i would do. I told him it was a surprise but he kept bu t babbyyy' ing me so i ended up telling him.

On our wedding night I am going to make a really nice dinner. we thought about take out so we wouldnt have to do anything but i think it will be more special if i make something. and i am going to get candles so its all candle lit and nifty lol. Then i told him I would dance for him.



That last part is something he has been asking for ever since Sam told him i am a good dancer at the hotel months and months ago. He has been curious and has wanted to see but i dont think that i am a very good dancer...so i know how to move my hips lol. So yes i am going to dance for him and he better be a happy oe hehehe



Well class is almost over, i may add more in yearbook. I am going to go for now though. Byez

I just got done with my spanish V exam. What a joke that was. I think if I would have taken any of the other spanish exams (Spanish I-!V) They would have been much harder. All that I had to do was write a one page doubled spaced paper in spanish about why the spanish language is important. I got it done in four minutes and now I have forty minutes almost. I had over an hour but i wrote a letter to mat first.

Today is mats birthday and i did get to talk to him this morning. He is so depressed, but i think talking to me helped alot. hes depressed that he is alone on his birthday for one and for two because of his age. He even started talking about how hes all old now and that im young still and I shut him up on that one really quickly. both last night and this morning he has been acting weird. he says that he feels that i am pulling away or that I am bored when he calls and neither on of those things are true. I dont know why he is even questioning me about it unless it is just his mood talking. That could very well be. We talked for a little while and he started talking more and then he said he was sorry for dumping his mood on me and i told him that he knows he can vent to me anytime and that i completely understand. He is going to call again when he gets out of work so i hope that i get to talk to him again today.

Today is a half day, the last day of exams and the last day of the semester. On monday i get my new class, business ethics. i dont know how that is going to go. I hope that it is an online instructor only and that we arent supervised by the principal. That would suck, he creeps me out. Anyways, I wanted to take that class the most because mat and I are looking at opening our own business down the road a little and i wanted some basic knowledge about business. It also said that this course is like a course on decision making which of course is not a bad thing to have when it comes to getting any kind of degree, no matter what it is.

I keep looking out the window at the snowstorm I dont know if its putting me into a philosophical mood or if it is depressing me. The line between the two when it comes to me is very thin. It could easily be one or the other. i keep looking at the people in their cars with wipers going like mad, I look at them hurrying into the school, to escape both the cold and the wind. I look at the trees that are bare but for the snow on the branches and I dont know if what I see is beautiful or gloomy. I dont know if what i see is a baring process or death until spring. I dont know what I feel. i am warm in here and i look out and can only imagine the cold. I wonder if there are those on the outside looking in, only with a fleeting remembrence of warmth. That thought makes me sad, though it humbles me at the same time. i dont ever take anything for granted. I have been taught that over and over again through different circumstances and happenings. Maybe thats why everything happened the way it did with mat. I am sure if i was like everyone else that we wouldnt have lasted. i am sure if I took anything for granted one of those things would have been him and i would have lost him a long time ago when shit got tough. I wonder at fate sometimes. If it is indeed a daily working force. If we really do have our lives mapped out, our every descision guessed accurately ahead of time. I like to think we make our own descions but how could we ever know. We could just be pawns in a long drawn out and detailed game. i guess we will never know for sure.

Well today was the first day of the mid-terms. I had advanced placement biology and yearbook. The bio test was pretty hard and my test was graded by the time we go out of there...but Tony got a 60% and he is normally the highest grade on tests, always above a 90%...so i am a little worried. i dont think i bombed it. I think i did okay except for the back page that i just bullshitted my way through. essays...eh. i cant stand them especially when it is on something from a few chapters back. Like i can remember anymore! I dont know though, i guess i will find out first thing tomorrow morning.

Yearbooks exam was very easy. All we had to do was make sure we have a final copy of our newspaper page done i had it mostly finished before i even came in here today so it was completely finished in around ten minutes.

Mom had to go to one of her wolf meetings today in grand rapids. i am hoping the the snow is going to slow her down and that i will be able to talk to mat when i get home and he is out of work. that would be very nice. i dont get to talk to him as much as i would like to anymore because of the lil housie. He is going to be getting the internet a landline phone and cable a week from today though. So it isnt too much longer that this is going to be going on. then i wont be bored out of my mind in the evenings anymore, going crazy trying to find something entertaining to do.

I called my cousin nick last night. Yesterday was his birthday, the big 17 lol. he made me laugh a little. His life is as it always is. His mom is a big huge hoe bag now. he said she has a new guy every week now He started talking to her for a minute and he said something like "well you know i gotta keep my bitches in line" refering to her lol. i just laughed my ass off. he has both his mom and his little brother calling him master. i thought that was kindof sad. he is still out of school. he dropped out for this year and doesnt want to go back, he didnt mention it anyway. All he does is make sure his little brother gets on the bus every morning, play video games, watch movies and eat and sleep. he has me very worried about him. he is going to be one person in my family that i am going to miss and worry about when i leave. Contact will be strained but then again it always kinda is between us. i am supposed to call tonight and i will if i can remember. that will make the time pass quicker and i wanted to know more about how his life is going.

i talked to mat this morning and he told me a couple of things that worried me too. I guess something went down yesterday at the prison. He is in cell block A working with the inmates. I guess in cell block C a few inmates started beating the shit out of one of the officers. They were stopped and the guy ended up being okay and the inmates got another ten years onto their sentences for assulting an officer, but it still makes me worry sooo much. if anything happened to mat i would go fucking insane. I knew the job was dangerous and obviously it wont go day to day without any conflicts or porblems, but i guess i never realized how severe and how often things go down there. Everyday something new happens. it worries me...

Well i got some pretty exciting news over the weekend, friday to be exact...



I AM GETTING MARRIED!!!!



Lol. I know, i know. We all know that i was getting married this next summer and everyone is invited. However...



I am getting married in a month and a half!!!!!!!



I called mat on friday after calling the airport and getting treated like i was a complete moron. We talked for a long time and then he was like I have a serious question to ask you. I asked him what was on his mind and he asked me if i wanted to get married. I said, well yes! We are already going to be getting married and he said no i mean when you come visit me, do you want to get married? I thought about it for about a fraction of a second before screaming YES! lol. So, we are going to elope when i go visit him, more then likely the day after i get there on Saturday, March 3rd. I am sooooo friin excited!

He kept asking me if I was absolutly sure this was what i want and he kept asking me if i felt like I was being rushed and i said that was i 100% positive that i want him for the rest of my life and that i am not being rush in the least bit. hell, if i could I would tell him to get his ass here and we would go and get married today. i have the 50 dollar marriage contract fee lol.

So yes I think we are goig to go completely non traditional for the eloping. we are going to wear just normal street clothes.

I got to thinking about this in another way too, i guess it just shows how perverse my mind is. if i come back home and mom starts throwing accusations at me about the two of us having sex I can say "Well, we did wait until we got married to have sex mom" LOL. i know it I am horrible. i cannot help the pattern of my thoughts though. i thought that one was kind of amusing myself.

So yes not only am I going to be seeing my fiance for a week, seeing our new apartment and being able to be a big huge cudlebug i am going to be a married woman. Mrs. Mathew Kelly :D I cannot wait! Now, all i have to do is talk to my brother and get him to check his email so that i can get those tickets that he has because i will have to use those this time. I tried calling the airport a few times, the first time I talked to a complete dick and the other time i chickened out when i got a busy phoneline. So i said fuck it and I will deal with the stops the tickets terry has on them. I will manage and hopefully i wont end up lost in another state far away lol. That wouldnt be a good thing. Anyways class is about to end so i should probably get going. i will probably add more later if i remember somthing that comes to mind then. Bye for now!

Melissa

I am just going to write a quick note in here today. my head hurts very fucking badly. I have been going through my old saved messages and those amused me a little, just lookin at this screen hurts. I feel like complete shit. I dont know how i am going to get through the rest of the day. mat moves into our apartment today, so we wont have the internet until the 23rd. So I will only be able to talk to him in the mornings, until his remaining three two hours on his cell phone runs out :( Its 12 days, i am hoping we can make it last so that we can talk in the mornings. It is unlimited still because its classifed as the evening but his phone takes 1 dollar a day as a fee so you cant hoard your minutes. It will suck if we cant talk every morning until then, but we will get through it. We always do. Okay I am going to go i cant look at this anymore.

I got out of macs class we have a sub in there again. i am sooo bored. i think i am going to try to stay home from school tomorow, just because there is nothing to do here and i dont feel like coming lol. There is also the reason that i could finally talk to mat on the phone for loonger then twenty minutes. that sounds fucking awesome to me right now. hehehehe. I am ure that mom wont mind me staying at all, i havnt exactly missed any school recently and I havnt been doing anything in any of my classes. i have finals next week but nothing is happening there. i have al the reviews i need already so again...there is absolutly nothing to do.

I miss my Sam. She is still out with her tonsils and she will be until next monday :(( I have to deal with all of the morons in this school all on my lonesome though. Oh! I talked to my counsler today and i got my next semester schedule changed a wee bit. i am taking an online business ethics course instead of continuing with global studies. I cant handle being in one of warnocks clases anymore, he drives me crazy. I cannot stand idle time when it coes to school because then i fid no point in being here. i am here to work if im not going to be working then i might as well be home. im not ito socializing and i am not into blowing off my schoolwork. so when there is nothing to do (Which is frequently) i get bored to the point where i dont even want to be here anymore and then i skip out of class like i am doing now lol. Iwas hoping i would cause my fiance on here, i thought possibly he took an early lunch or soehting. i cant get out of my next class which is when he takes his NORMAL lunch. I will have an online class then though so i may be able to talk to him durning that once i get used to the workloa and see how long the daily assignment take :D Im such a devious person lol.

Well i am going to go this class is almost over. I am going to get through today and i am going to talk to my mat tonight and on the phone in the monring yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We have our apartment now!!! Yay!!! Mat moves in on thursday and he has to sleep on the floor for a little while. I guess it is a very spacious two bedroom house and everything is new inside except the stove is a few years old. The kitchen is a white tile design and he said everything is very clean.

We are going to have our master bedroom and then we are turning the smaller room into an office/tv game room. We are putting the tv, a futon and a tv in there along with the game system (mat wants a ps3) lol. H eis going to look into the cable,phone and internet and see if he can get a package deal so hopefully that happens really quickly. He wont have internet or a landline phone for a while so the only times we can tlak is in the morning before i go to school and before he goes to work and when mom is off we wont be able to talk at all :((

that will SUCK! But it wont last too long. At the very worst it will last until feb 1st.

Sam is gone today, she is getting her tonsils out and i misses her. She will be gone from school all week! 5th hour and 7th hour are going to get on my nerves so badly, mr mac better let me come down to the library often lol. I cant handle the class on a daily basis without sam...im likely to go on a killing spree lol. Class i sbaout to gt out so i should probably end this now. I may write another later, i will most likely be bored enough lol

Yay! Its friday! I had to get that out of my system. This week has been so fuckin long. I feel like I have been back to school for a month already.

Mat is going to go and look at the apartment today on his lunch break and fill out the application form so i am very excited about that. We will have our own place soon...woohoo!!

I still havnt come up with a plan for next month. i am going to try to come up with something this weekend.

Heh speaking of this weekend. mr philips, my ap bio teacher was an asshole. i have a take home test I have to do now. I just had to do two different chapter study guides last night for the damn class. It sucks :( So this is very mandatory homework..yay for that.

I just want to sleeeeepppp. I havnt been getting much since school started. i et to sleep okay i just cant STAY asleep. i keep waking up every hour on the hour and it irritates me.

My level on here keeps going down too becaus eof all o the people that join here every day...its a damn conspiracy. lol.

Alright well i have some stuff i have to get done for english so i am going to do that before i get into twouble.

Well today has been pretty well. I didnt write yesterday I didnt really have anything to say and Sam yelled at me a little lol. She was making fun of my declaration that i was going to be writing in here every day and I didnt yesterday. oh well. I am writing today...so there!

Mom FINALLY went back to work today after being off since 12 pm sunday. So i was very very very very very excited. I got to talk to my mat this morning! he had pulled an all nighter over the anticipation of me calling him so he was wide awake and he answered the phone on the first ring. It was awesome.

We find out about our apartment today! YAY! The lady shouldbe calling him on his cellphone between 2 nd 3 his time. So around 4 or 5 my time. So when we get on the computer later tonight I should know whats going on!

The only bad thing about getting the apartment is that he wont have internet for a few weeks so we wouldnt be able to talk in the evenings and if mom is off work we wouldnt be able to talk at all :( he said he is thinking about staying the hotel for as long as he can before he moves in so that he gets his moneys worth there and we can talk longer. :)

I cant wait for this weekend. This week seems like it has been going by verrryyyy slooowwllllyy. I havnt had hardly any work to do in any of my classes so that makes my classes seem even longer. Hell, in my independent spanish class I have gotten so bored that i have started two different scholarship essays lol. Thats kindof sad when you think about but oh well, sad but true.

Im really nervous about my birthday. Mat thinks I am going to choke when i go to tell mom but I know that i wont. I am going to tell her everything because it eats at me inside that we have to hide and that she makes all the comments that she does. It bothers me a whole hell of alot. I am going on a plane ride on march second and i am going back on the eleventh. I will be eighteen by then but i got contridicted by someone in my weightlifting class. i was told regardless if i am eighteen or not I cant call myself out of school unless i get my parent to sign a paper stateing that i have responsibility to sign myself out. That makes no sense, yet i had heard of this paper before. I thought about it for a while and i know that i would go anyway and damn the school. I figure the way i am going to do it is i am going to get a preauthorized absence sliop ahead of time and have all of my teachers sign it and then i am going to see if i can have terry sign it or i am going to try and get away with signing it. i thought about waiting to tell mom until the day after my birthday and trying to get her to sign that slip on my birthday but i doubt that she will do it because she will think that i will skip alot when she is not there to stop me or something. i dont know. I am still tryingto come up with a plan. We will see how it goes i guess.

Well today is the first day back to school from winter break. I am excited yet sad at the same time. I like being back because it gives me something to do other then reading or watching movies which was driving me nuts! But I dont get to talk to Mat as often now :( I can still call him in the mornings but not on his lunch too like i was doing every day.

Mom has been off work since sunday and she will continue to be off until thursday. That is also driving me crazy. I have been talking to Mat on the computer still but I havnt been able to talk to him on the phone at all. I havnt been able to hear his voice.

I have become very spoiled I think. I cant help it. When it comes to him i am both selfish and greedy, I know that I am so it makes it very easy to admit. I cant get enough of him. When I am talking to him constantly all i want is to talk to him more. I cant wait until we are living together.

Oh speaking of living together, mat found an apartment! the lady is going to call him on thurday between 2-3 and she is going to go over the details with him so i hope that all works out. Its 525 a month, 2 bedrooms with a garage. Fucking awesome :) So when i go down there in march We are going to be staying at our house!!! Awww!!!!

Anyways back to school things. Ap bio I had to wirte a type three and in imaging i was done with the assignment before we left. Weightlifting was nice, i had felt like shit all last week from doing nothing but being lazy so i worked hard today and i feel good.

Today is going by at a steady pace, at least its not dragging on and on by any means. that is nice. I will get home and only have a few hours to wait until i can talk to mat! Woohoo!

Well lunch is about to end so i am going to end this. I have a computer class next hour so i may get back on here and add some more or maybe ill write a whole new journal...who knows. Anyways, bye for now!